IC Contact

[foreshadower]

IC CONTACT


[ Shade prefers letters or other sorts of mail, but he can also be contacted through text or voice. ]

Comments

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[foreshadower]

Churros?

Child?

My boy you must be mistaken.

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[brushoff]

Let me guess.
You're not Will Graham.

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[foreshadower]

Hardly! This is the Shade.

If you'd like a Churro, I could whip one up.

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[brushoff]

These phones are unreliable pieces of mass-produced crap. Mine's been giving out all day.

But no, I don't need a churro. Will's daughter and I talked at last swear-in and I tried to bribe her with them. (Though, I have to admit, I'd pay big money to see you willingly eat a churro.)

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[foreshadower]

Ah, I... see.

That explains a lot of today, actually.

But you would be right, I'm not a fan of...anything deep-fried. Including Spanish delights, I'm afraid. It would have to be a large sum.

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[brushoff]

Let me guess: I'm not the first person who misdialed you?

Deep-fried things are good in moderation. I think I could eat half a churro but eating a whole one would make me gag.

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[foreshadower]

You are MY first, but...

Well, I live with others. I've heard plenty of what's happening to them so0 far.

As for deep-fried... It's simply too much. I'd rather my food taste fresh, unless I'm eating something from home. English food is, unfortunately, always going to be the exception.

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[brushoff]

The perils of living alone—I didn't know this was happening until I sent someone the wrong picture three times.

Even an aesthete as yourself can't resist the siren song of greasy pub grub.

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[foreshadower]

Greasy breakfasts, as well.

There's nothing I like better than kidneys with my breakfast, but heaven forbid you say that here.

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[brushoff]

You'd have a multitude of grossed out imPorts.

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[foreshadower]

Mmm, they likely haven't had it prepared properly, is the issue.

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[brushoff]

Well, that too. Americans are terrible at any sort of non-American cuisine.

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[foreshadower]

They simply don't understand anything other than deep fried, I'm afraid.

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[brushoff]

It's truly a culinary tragedy.

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[foreshadower]

And this is why Americans have to steal from every other cuisine.

And deep fry it.

Ugh.

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[brushoff]

There, there, I'm sure your tainted palette will recover eventually.

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[foreshadower]

It's a lot of work to cleanse one's palate, you know. Especially when the meal is so foul.

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[brushoff]

You know, one might call you a drama queen because of this!

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[foreshadower]

They did in prison, because I complained about the food, I suppose they'll do it now too.

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[brushoff]

Well really, I don't blame you for complaining.

Speaking though of prison...your thoughts on this probation attempt? Nothing specific, just how you think it would compare.

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[foreshadower]

After what I went through?

It's a far cry better, honestly. I could eat what I want, outside of prison. And there's no...talk sessions.

[ Brainwashing sessions. ]

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[brushoff]

It really is a better deal, isn't it? Which, of course, makes me wonder how long it's going to last.

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[foreshadower]

Hopefully long enough! Say I DO act out again, I'd hate to get the raw end of the deal.

Again.

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[brushoff]

I fully admit that you did get stuck with the raw end of the deal with regards to Bonnie and Clyde. Still, I think charbroiled Dorian and later having to deal with my god-awful probation officer evens out the karmic scales a little bit.

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[foreshadower]

[ RUDE DORIAN ]

Well, burning is unpleasant. Did I ever tell you about the time I had a bomb fall on me? I can't imagine charbroiling is much better.